Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
