I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
