I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
