Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
