sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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