So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
