was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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