It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
