i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
