I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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