I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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