idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
