problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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