Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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