Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
