i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
