and my herpes radar will keep us safe
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
