I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
