nut hugger
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
We had to coat check the pizza.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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