If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Then you guys just all showered together...?
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
