we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
