party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize