He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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