a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
