Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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