Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
