too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
