some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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