I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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