Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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