Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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