now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
