yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
