i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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