Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize