its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
