is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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