so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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