I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
