I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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