If i could tip my vagina, i would.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
