They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
