Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
