out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
