Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize