I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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