By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
