there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
