butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
