True but thats because hes a fetus.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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