So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
