ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
