i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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