Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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